Hey, Harold Camping campers, y’all remember my offer??? I’m still waiting to hear from you. C’mon guys! I mean, you’re spending all this money to put up billboards warning people of the end . . . so it’s clear you’re not having any second thoughts — obviously, you’re all in, right? You’re a faithful Camper, right?? No doubts. WECanKNOW.COM and all that, right?
So why haven’t I heard from any of you? You know you can’t take it with you, so what’s the deal???
Time’s a-wasting, so, once more, here’s the deal: I’ll buy from you (at .0001 on the dollar) all houses, lands, new (or “like new”) electronics, 2011 Alabama football tickets, luxury cars (if they’re in mint/fine condition), all valuable paintings, jewelry, and antiques — along with an option on anything else that you own — I’ll even agree not to take possession of anything until May 22, 2011, to allow you full usage of your stuff until Rapture Day.
Just give me a call, we’ll work out the details. And you need to get a move on. You’ve only got, what? 24 days left? It’s getting late, so take care of your business!
You shouldn’t leave your stuff to just anybody — give it to someone who cares. Namely me. Give it to me.
And remember, should the unthinkable happen and you’re still here on May 22, I’m the only guy out there who guarantees he’ll sell your stuff back to you (and I promise I’ll give you a great price with low, low interest).
So, we got a deal?
The phone lines are open. Call me.
There’s a billboard on the freeway just north of Milwaukee WI that says:
JUDGMENT DAY: May 21st
The Bible Guarantees It!
FamilyRadio.com
I think you should put in some long distance offers for these guys in Wisconsin :^D
Less than an hour before reading your blog, I posted this on my facebook…
“Encountered four followers of Harold Camping today on the Boardwalk in AC who were handing out Judgment Day tracks. Two young women and two boys, around ages 8 to 10. I told the boys I would take their flyer if they would promise me that if Jesus did not come back on May 21st that they would not give up the faith and that they would go to church. Please pray that they would remember my few and simple words.”
I have often thought, over the years, that I would love to be able to see the stock portfolios of all these folks that try to sell us these books about the rapture or that Christ will return on whatever date is currently in vogue.
I’d be willing to bet these folks have got their long financial futures in order so they will be able to survive long after the rest of us are “raptured” or whatever.
By then they’ll have another generation to hawk their wares to.